2005

I'm so mad at my mom right now- I can't believe that she pissed me off like that. She doesn't understand how hard it is to be me. She doesn't know how to take care of herself. She doesn't know how to control her emotions, and stop freaking out like an idiot. I'm sick and tired of being her puppet and trying to comply to her emotions. one second she'll be happy- and then the next minute she'll be sad. I just need to finish my school and be done wiht it. I help out the family 100%- and I don't leave anything for myself, which has proven to mean nothing. I don't feel appreciated- just oppressed by this monster whose emotions fluctuate every second. When my mom is mad she manages to make a ton of noise with whatever it is she's doing, and yes it does sound like hell is breaking out in my kitchen now. I can hear all the pots and pans being thrown around and abused. This is her way of expressing her inner emotions.

Why do you have to be so angry all the time? Is is really worth getting angry? What is it that upset her so much that makes her so angry? She's so upset with the way things are, but I can't change that. My mom hates the world. She thinks that there are people out there to get her. She thinks that people are manipulate degenerate low lives. I dont' blame her, afterall being a single mother isn't easy. Being a single daughter isn't easy either.

Why is she so angry- not that this will solver the problem, but she needs to be more accurate about her reasons for being angry, because it's not fair when she takes it out on me.