So I Should Be Happy.

Went shopping today - again. I need to stop shopping. It's 8pm now and I'm soooooooooooooooooooo bored. I'm wondering if I should head down to Kabin tonight, but again I'm not very sure about that yet either. A bit torn and don't know if maybe I should just stay home. Staying home on a Saturday would certainly suck a lot- or maybe not. Right now I'm blasting music and trying to think about what I would wear to Kabin if I end up going. Most likely I'm gonna hang out with Cat and Dave- So many things that I cannot write here, but definitely being single again has it's pros and cons. I feel relieved- but at the same time wondering how it would feel if there was someone there. Or maybe after three years I'm not sure what to occupy myt ime with, or what is it that I have a passion for. I want to truly find myself and discover my inner self- (sounds like I want to be so complicated *lol), yeah, very gay but I really need time to see this world through my own eyes. I no longer need to be looking out for another person - I can take care of myself and be there for myself. Something that was lacking from my usual behaviour. I think that by finding myself I will find out what I want to do in this life. My dream was to become a graphic designer- and I've done that already. So everything else is just extra for me, so foronce I can finally be happy and satisfied. I should be happy with my life... I have my mom, my friends, my two cats, a good job, and education, and starting my graphic design business.... So I should be happy. I feel like I want to do something. I want to accomplish a lot before I finish my final year at UTSC. Although I really wanted to take on the spot for President in the New Media Club, I will need to pass that on to someone who can and will dedicate for time into the club *sigh*. I definitely want to produce more paintings this year, and have an exhibit before the year ends. Maybe I'll visit some galleries this week - on yeah on top of all the other things that I need to accomplish.